An Un-Pinterest Wedding

Comparison is the thief of joy & why you should consider an Un-Pinterest wedding.

Can you imagine planning a wedding without Pinterest?

If you are currently in the trenches of wedding planning or even just dreaming of your one-day-wedding, you’re probably utilizing the amazing tool that Pinterest is. If I was planning my wedding today instead of 7 years ago, I would be using it too!

Have you ever heard the quote: “Comparison is the thief of joy”?

It’s a popular quote that goes around Mom-circles & Mom-blogs & Mom-life in general. Here’s why: Moms love to look at other Mom’s lives. The problem comes into place when all we see of other Mom’s lives is their beautiful, perfect, curated Instagram squares. And we simply assume that their lives are beautiful and perfect. We compare worst to their best and of course we always come up lacking.

It’s not a problem confined to Moms though.
People in general have this “comparison” problem.

We compare dogs, houses, decor, clothing, purses, style, behavior, attitudes, meals, cleanliness, hair-styles, vacations, “free-time”, work-ethics, tans, number of cups of coffee, cell phones, and landscaping. The list literally goes on and on. Oh, and another category to add to the list? Weddings.

Brides compare their weddings to the weddings of their friends. Parents compare their children’s weddings to the weddings of their friend’s children. Everyone wants something bigger, better, fancier, and more elaborate.

And Pinterest fuels all of this comparison.

As a bride begins down the path of planning her wedding, she’ll most likely start within her Pinterest “dream wedding” board. Yes, most brides already have a “dream wedding” board, even before getting engaged. And thus begins the problem. Without a careful, thoughtful approach to wedding Pinteresting, it’s so easy for things to get out of hand. And suddenly, her budget, her DIY ideas, and her thought of a “simple” wedding are tossed out the window as she’s overwhelmed comparing her “small” plans with the elaborate & over-the-top pictures on Pinterest.

Did you know, that most of the perfect pictures on Pinterest are fake?

And by “fake” I mean that they’re from styled shoots – wedding vendors who come together and put their best work forward. Then a photographer is given a large amount of stress-free time to photograph the perfectly put together pieces. Models are typically brought in to showcase wedding day fashion & everything is put in the very best light.

That being said: why are you comparing your real life wedding with the fake weddings on Pinterest?

This is my plea to you: please do not let Pinterest rob you of the joy of wedding planning. For real! Planning a wedding can absolutely be hard & stressful, but it’s something that you only do once in a lifetime & it should be approached with grace & appreciation, not comparison.

Your real life wedding will be more beautiful than any styled shoot because you’ll have what every styled shoot is missing: real, authentic moments with natural emotion. Your Dad tearing up the first time he sees you in your wedding dress. The smiles of your guests as you walk down the aisle. The hugs & kisses of your family as they celebrate with you. Your Mom & Grandma wiping tears as you & your Dad share a Father/Daughter dance. Your husband sweeping you off your feet to carry you out of the reception.

I promise you, your wedding will not be perfect, but that’s what makes it beautiful.

I have photographed so many weddings and there are problems at every single one. Little problems, minor snags, small snafus, even big day-altering issues sometimes – they are always present on a wedding day. However, how you handle those problems will determine how joyous of a wedding day you have. Will you get upset that your “Pinterest perfect wedding” is falling apart? Or will you smile and graciously accept that nothing is perfect & it will just give you something to look back & laugh about?