Trust Me, You’ll Need More Time | Wedding Day Advice from a Wedding Photographer

A friend of mine was talking on Instagram a few weeks ago about how time is such a tricky thing to plan – ESPECIALLY on wedding days.

After photographing weddings for the last 12 years, I can say without a doubt:
Trust me, you’ll need more time than you realize.

Time to soak it all in.
From big things: realizing that it’s your day, how you look, how you feel, and the smiles on your guests’ faces.
To medium-sized things: how beautiful your dress fits, how delicious your cake tastes, and how warm your guests’ hugs feel.
To small things: how your flowers smell, the slight breeze in the air, your Dad’s misty eyes, and the sound of your spouse’s heartbeat as you share your first dance.

Time to actually look your new spouse in the eyes.
Your wedding day is a celebration, a party, a long-awaited event, but it’s centered around two people: you & your new spouse. You will want to take some time to soak in the moment together. After all, without the other person, this day would not be a wedding.

Time to not feel rushed.
Trust me, there is nothing worse than feeling rushed on a wedding day. Stress and anxiety creep in and rob you of the delightful, glorious day it’s meant to be. When you’re rushed, you forget things you meant to remember and cut out things you wanted to do. It breaks my heart whenever a wedding day is running behind and the bride & groom tell me that they’ve decided to cut part of their plans out of the timeline in order to get the day back on track.

Time to eat.
Listen: no one can go full-speed for 12+ hours on a wedding day, with all the mental, emotional, and physical load that is a wedding day without sitting down and eating. And yet, more often than not, I see brides & grooms skip dinner in lieu of going table-to-table to greet their guests. Yes, that’s important, but so is eating so you don’t pass out half-way through your reception (or feel so sick that you have to hide in another room).

Everything takes about twice as long as you expect it to on your wedding day.

On a normal day, it probably takes you about 30-60 seconds to grab what you need, slide on your shoes, and walk out the door to hop in your car.
But on a wedding day, it can take upwards of 20-30 minutes to grab what you need, put your shoes on, and walk out the door to get in your wedding day transportation. You have to keep your dress clean & pressed, there are a million things to remember, and just moving in a dress & fancy shoes takes way more effort than anyone realizes.

Don’t even get me started on the process of bustling your dress: your seamstress knows exactly how she put the bustle in & can pin/tie it up in a snap. But I promise: your Mom and bridesmaids are going to need at least 10-15 minutes (if not more) to not only figure it out, but find all of the buttons/hooks/loops/ribbons and pull it together (especially if they’ve never done it before).

I always tease that for guys – getting ready is super quick & easy (they step into their pants, button their shirts & ready to roll) but there is so much more than that! I’d say, a solid 50% of guys do not know how to tie their tie (or bowtie), so they have to look up and follow a YouTube tutorial (which is totally fine and fun, but takes extra time). They have cufflinks, pocket squares, boutonnieres – all of these things take extra time to figure out and put on. So, don’t skimp on the guy’s “getting ready” time either!

It will take longer to get through your receiving line than you plan.
It will take longer to get through family formals than you plan (mostly because “Great Aunt Susie” has wandered off and is talking to someone in a side hallway of the church).
It will take longer to get in and out of your wedding day transportation than you plan.
It will take longer to be lined up for your reception introductions than you plan.
It will take longer to greet each table than you plan.

Here’s the bottom line:

Your wedding day will FLY by faster than any other day of your life.
And if you try to cram too much into too little time, it will leave you feeling anxious, stressed, and overwhelmed.

So, my best advice, when planning out your wedding day timeline, is to schedule yourself more time than you think you need (and then add extra time on top of that).
Build yourself in some buffers so that when things go wrong (we haven’t even talked about things going wrong!) you aren’t left stressed out that you’re behind schedule. (Traffic, wardrobe malfunctions, ceremonies not starting on time, dinner service going long, etc.)

As much as things are in your control – plan for extra time.

That way, you have the time to soak it all in.
You will have the time to look your new spouse in the eyes.
You will have the time to eat.
You will have the time to not feel rushed.

And you will have the time to throughly enjoy and delight in this incredible celebration you’ve been waiting your entire life for.