Our Love Story: Part 8

Preface: If you’ve missed any of the “chapters” of our love story so far, go back & get caught up before continuing below!
Part 1 — Part 2 — Part 3 — Part 4 — Part 5 — Part 6 — Part 7

We had just left the Abbey House on the Pennsylvania & New York state border to begin the trek back across the state to go home. I was once again stuffed into Paul & Naomi’s backseat, surrounded by suitcases, pillows, and bags of stuff. I was a mixture of emotions. On one hand, I was thrilled with the way the extended weekend had played out – it had been packed full, but easy going and had given Naomi & I plenty of time to hang out together. On the other hand, I was disappointed with the way the extended weekend had played out – because it had been packed so full & I’d spent so much time with Naomi, I felt like I’d missed the purpose of the trip: to get to know Derrick better.

As we reached the “one-hour” mark of our 5-hour trip, Paul got a phone call – from his brother. Since he was driving, he handed the phone to Naomi to answer. We listened and began to panic as we only heard Naomi’s side of the conversation: “Hi Derrick!” “Omigosh, are you okay?” “How bad is it?” “Are you sure you’re okay?” A few minutes passed &  the phone was handed back to me, “He wants to talk to you.”

Nervously, I took the phone, “Hello?”

“Hey Kara, how’s it going?” I heard Derrick’s anxious voice say on the other end of the line.

“It’s fine – is everything okay?”

“I’m fine – I just saw a horrible car accident.”

He went on to explain that right in front of him, a car swerved into oncoming traffic. The car coming toward them attempted to swerve out of the way, but the two vehicles collided head-on. Since Derrick witnessed the whole accident, he stopped & jumped out to see if he could help either of the drivers. The first driver he came to was the car who swerved into oncoming traffic. He said the driver was badly injured and didn’t seem quite coherent. He seemed to have massive head trauma and Derrick guessed that he had had a seizure (which was why he had lost control of his car). He stayed with him until the ambulances arrived. It was a horrific accident that ended up closing down the road for more than 2 hours.

Derrick was obviously shaken. The realization that he was just moments away from being in the middle of the accident himself was heavy on our car. It gave the rest of our trip home a more solemn and thankful feel.

I got home that night a little after 10pm. My Dad was the only one home as my Mom & siblings were staying down at the Lake House for the entire week. My Dad & I have always had a really good, easy relationship, so even though it was late, I plopped down on the couch & told him all about my weekend away.

And then, he surprised me with a question: “So, what’s the next step you want to take with Derrick?”

I was totally taken back and not sure how to answer his question. I smiled, and sheepishly said, “Uhh, I’d like to get to know him more?”

To which Dad responded, “And how do you plan on doing that?”

I told him that we had swapped phone numbers, so we could chat on the phone now, and then the lightbulb went off: “And we could have him come here sometime!”

Dad smiled and nodded – obviously the answer he was looking for. He asked when I thought Derrick would be able to come visit & I said I didn’t know, but I’d find out & let him know!

I came home from work the next day to an email from Derrick. He talked about how shook up the accident had left him – especially when the reality of the driver’s situation sunk in. Derrick honestly wasn’t sure if the driver who caused the accident would live or die. He had found one lone news article that reported on the accident, but it simply listed the drivers of both vehicles as “in the hospital”.

“Ok, on to happier topics. The weekend, I had a great time. I asked Naomi and Paul a couple times if they thought you were enjoying yourself. Naomi told me you are a little shy, I didn’t realize that you are kinda shy. I mean, with these long emails that you send me, I thought you would talk anybody’s ear off.”

I wrote him back & told him that my Dad was curious as to his summer schedule & wanted to know when he’d be able to come visit us. I promised Derrick, that if he came to visit (on my home turf this time), that I’d be more talkative.

Dates were tossed out and eventually, we settled on a visit happening in September. With Derrick’s schedule working at the YMCA, continuing to take voice-lessons several times a week, as well as “babysitting” for a family of boys, his days were packed. So, we settled in to wait the 6 weeks it would be until we saw each other again.

Derrick: “Just to let you know, your emails, you can write as much as you want! Those moments of reading your emails are the parts of the day that I look forward most to. So write whatever you want, whenever you want. Every email from you brings another smile to my face!”

Kara: “everyone (my extended family) kept asking me last night when i was bringing my “boyfriend” home to meet them all.. i was like.. “uhhh.. he’s not my boyfriend?” and they were like “shut-up.. just look at your face.. you can’t hide it” and it’s impossible to argue with these people.. so i just let them call you that.. they all went on and on about how tall and handsome you were.. and how happy they were for me.. makes me wish you lived closer..”

We still wrote each other long emails. But now, phone calls peppered our days as well. We couldn’t talk every day as our schedules were pretty crazy, but whenever we had mutual time off, we’d catch up on the phone. This was before the age of texting, so we’d tell each other stories about our days. Derrick would tell me about getting caught in the rain at the pool with a group of campers, about the antics the boys he babysat got into, and about auditioning for Sight & Sound Theater. I told Derrick all about how I slept thru my alarm and was late for work at KFC – and we had an inspector show up that day, how I assisted Paul & Naomi’s wedding photographer on a wedding day, and how I had to scrub the garbage cans at work with bleach. (And yes, these are 2 photos I took at that very first wedding I helped to photograph & yes, this was how I edited them – literal face-palm)

Derrick: “This whole weekend, I’ve been thinking about my life and looking back at things that I could’ve done different. Basically, I’ve been thinking if this is the path that I want to be one (performing music, writing, etc) and I just don’t know. Don’t get me wrong, I do believe that God has given me a talent and I need to use it, it’s just, don’t know if music is what I want to do for the rest of my life….I think that I will enjoy it for it’s time and season, but I don’t know, I’m just thinking ahead of myself I guess. You know, don’t know if I ever said this or not, but roller coaster designing has always been my dream. Ever since I was a little kid, that’s all I would ever think about. Yeah, coasters isn’t just this passing fancy for me, it’s been part of my life. Don’t know exactly what it was that pulled me to them at such a young early age. I always loved to just stand by roller coasters, you know, I could probably just stand by one all day and not care to move…just listening to the wheels as they rumble down the track, see the steel move as the coaster train rolls on by…..You know, if I knew that I was guaranteed  to get a job in designing roller coasters after completing the education needed for it, I would go back in time and do it…..but that is what I think I would do anyways…..The thing that makes me question that is 1, I wouldn’t know the people that I know now…including you (so that is definitely my reason of not changing it!)   Also, yes, it would be fun to design the roller coasters, but I know deep inside, I wouldn’t be doing what I feel God wants me to do. I feel that I would just be having fun  making it through life, but not making a difference in the world. You know what’s funny, after writing this stuff down, I have decided that it would be stupid to go back and change my past (not like I could, but it would be stupid none the less!) So, I don’t know exactly what I’m going with this, just randomly saying stuff now I guess.”

Kara: “i loved your “random” paragraph about how.. you still dream of building roller coasters.. but you don’t think that’s where God wants you to be.. i can relate because  deep down i dream of being this amazing photographer.. i read photography blogs all the time and its just like.. wow i want to be like THAT.. but then i always am hit with.. is that really what i want to invest my life in? and part of me says YES !! you need to run after your dream.. be that independent business women who makes her name known in the world.. but then deep down.. i know that my deepest desire — the desire that God has implanted in me from the time i was very little.. is to be a wife and mother.. who is able to stand by her husband and serve God with him.. and raise her children up to be mighty men & women of God.. *shrugs* so as much as i love photography? nothing will ever be able to take away from that desire to become who God made me to be.. i heard someone say once “what is the one thing.. that if you died today you would regret not doing?” and instantly my thought was.. i would regret not being able to be a wife and mom.. *shrugs* so .. there’s MY random paragraph for the day”

And then, out of the blue, I got this random email:

Kara,

Alright, this is something that’s been driving me crazy for the last couple days that I need to say. Here it goes….

I want to tell you how I feel about our relationship. The fact is, I really, really, like you and I’m very interested in you…not as a friend, but as something more, which would be something leading into a courtship relationship. What I am saying is, I’m not ready to ask you into a courtship relationship, simply because that would be too soon for that. I’m letting you know how I feel about us and now I want to know how you feel. Just trying to figure out if we are on the same page.  Alright, what I’m asking you is : are you interested in me, do you see this relationship heading in the direction that I mentioned? I’m not asking you if you feel that you are ready to be in a courtship relationship, because like I said, it would be too soon for that. Just need to know how you feel…..

Ok, I hope that I explained it thoroughly what I’m trying to say, I am very nervous while writing this….

I responded:

dear derrick..

i want to start out by thanking you for your up front-ness and honesty.. i can’t even imagine how nervous and anxious you must’ve been to write me that note and now to get my reply back.. i want to preface what i’m going to say with this: over the past month and a half i have grown to treasure our friendship immensely.. i anxiously await your emails and read them over and over again.. i loved to hear your voice on the phone sunday.. and i find myself thinking about you more and more often — wondering what you are doing.. how your day is going.. taking the moment to send up a prayer to heaven that you’re safe and having a good day..

i guess i have yet to say how i feel about you huh? *smiles* well.. to say it simply “the fact is, I really, really, like you and I’m very interested in you…not as a friend, but as something more” haha sorry.. for once i’m at a loss for words 🙂 it’s not that i’m surprised by your admission.. i had a feeling you were going to say something about it sooner or later.. i’m humbled by it tho’.. that someone like you could possibly be interested in someone like me.. and i’m not just saying that.. you are an incredible guy derrick.. one that any girl would be absolutely ecstatic to find out your interest in her.. and so i’m shocked.. and feel like asking.. ‘why me?’

i do really really like you.. you make me laugh and brighten my day.. i find myself missing you more and more as the days go by and wishing that i could see you sooner than september.. i anxiously run home to check my email to see if i have any new emails from you.. i love when paul & naomi tease me about you.. and i love how my little siblings ask me about you and want to see your picture again.. i love to talk about you and live thru every memory of you that i have over and over again..

Part of the reason (other than Derrick being super busy) that we had set September as our next chance to see each other, was because every weekend in the summer found my family at the Lake House. Not just my immediate family though, but my Grandparents, Aunt & Uncle – and their kids as well. In total, 17 people were at the Lake House on the weekends in the summer, and it didn’t seem the most appropriate environment to invite Derrick into.

That is, until we realized that there was one weekend on the calendar, that my Grandparents & Aunt & Uncle weren’t coming down to the Lake House. My parents proposed the idea of inviting Derrick down and I instantly called him & left him a message asking his availability for the weekend of August 1-3. Would there be any possible way he could get the time off to come for a visit in less than 2 weeks?

Since he didn’t get in until late that night, he wrote me an email: “Yes! I can come down the weekend you said: August 1-3. I will simply request those days off. Not a problem at all! You don’t know how excited I am to know that I can come and see you so soon!”

And like that, we went from a countdown of 45 days to see each other again, to 12 days.

..Part 9 coming soon!